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Shooting Squirrels is Such Fun! (Warning-No Kids!)

DigitalDarrell

Knoxville, US
5987 posts

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DigitalDarrell Team Member Founding Member of the Nikonians writer Guild. Author of most of the NikoniansPress books. Donor Ribbon awarded for his generous support to the Fundraising Campaign 2014 Donor Ribbon awarded for his very generous support to the Fundraising Campaign 2015 Charter Member
Tue 25-Sep-07 09:58 PM

Today, someone mentioned squirrels in the forums. Immediately my blood pressure rose to dangerous levels. Again, I started contemplating evil things concerning squirrels. Somebody help me!

But, you must understand -- it is NOT my fault. For you see, I have several demonized squirrels in my yard. They eat 50 pounds of birdseed every day. They can levitate to get to the bird feeders. They have "Jaws of Life" built into their teeth and can rip the entire top off of a bird feeder. They have made a pact with the moles so that I trip any time I get near the feeders. I think they are now eating birds too.

Soon, I must learn to love squirrel flesh. Roasted squirrel, squirrel soup, squirrel hamburger, squirrel spaghetti and meatballs, squirrel butter for my toast. I must now go to the store and buy myself a nice .50 caliber sniper rifle. These squirrels must die!

Well, I best shut up, since this is a family forum. I don't want the kids to be thinking of mangled squirrel bodies as they try to go to sleep. (However, I often contemplate how to best mangle squirrel bodies!)

Such cute little rodent demons! I must now go prepare the mortar launcher.

"Squirrels ... Nature's Little Speed Bumps!"

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Darrell Young (DigitalDarrell) www.pictureandpen.com
"Better too many words than not enough understanding."
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