I own D5100 and I am completely happy with it(of course budget was concern at time of deciding.. otherwise I could have D7000). I don't shoot MUCH outdoor though - just not to notice focus point visibility issue.
I never find that problem. If you find it difficult to see AF points, then D7000 also will carry same problem, just more AF points density.
Couple of things might help - in LCD you can see position of focus points (in AF- Single pt mode) - during focus you can enable confirmation 'bip' sound just to know it focused properly.