I posted the link to the Distortion control data update. These updates have historically been at the Nikon Global Site, and not on the "local" Nikon sites.
That being said, it's fine being wary of my posts, especially since you've been around here for less than a year, and I assure you I'm wary of posts of some people, and many websites. However, you could have easily gone to the Nikon Global site itself directly, to verify the download.
I must add, however, that the originator of all Nikon software is not Nikon USA, but Nikon Global. They may link you back to Nikon USA as a US user, but then again, often Nikon USA links you right back to Nikon Global. By the way, there is a lot of great stuff at Nikon Global that isn't on Nikon USA's website. Plus the Nikon Digitutor site is also really helpful with content not at Nikon USA. Nikon USA often has links to Nikon Digitutor, however.
There are also many times Nikon USA is one of the last Nikon companies to get information to support Nikon products. For example, I was able to get a digital copy of the D4 manual from Nikon Europe, two days before it first appeared at Nikon USA. The D4 Networking Guide didn't show up on Nikon USA until 9 days after it was available on the Nikon sites in Europe.
There is a link to the Nikon Global download page for this update at Nikon USA. You go to Service & Support > Download Center, then click on "Get the most recent Nikon firmware versions." That takes you to:
If you look at the table headings, on the right you'll see the heading: Distortion Control Data- Windows, Distortion Control Data- Mac.
Those links take you to the Nikon Global site and the download page for this update. I linked everyone to the Windows page, but as it turns out, both pages have links to both the Windows and Mac updates.
I'm sorry that you got such a poor response from Nikon via "Ask Nikon." I have found that the support people there aren't nearly as good as the support people you get on the phone and gave up using "Ask Nikon" a long time ago.
As far as their telephone support goes, I haven't had problems with them. They've been pleasant to me and helpful. In fact, just last week I had a D4 question and got an answer in seconds. I had completely missed what section of the manual I was in. Had I not missed it I wouldn't have needed to make the call. The support person could have treated me poorly, for missing the section, if he was a dolt, but treated me with the utmost of respect and courtesy.
Unfortunately, while I'm not making excuses for Nikon, most support service centers, including Nikon, have a fairly high personnel turnover rate. I suspect you got some new people who need to learn a lot more, including how to look up answers in Nikon's well crafted database support personnel utilize.
I have several Canon compact cameras and their customer service, in my opinion, is no better or worse than Nikon. As with Nikon, it's who you get, their personality, how new they are on the job, and how experienced they are with photography and Canon products.